Captain_calico's recent activity

  1. Comment on Just wanna talk about drinking less in ~talk

    Captain_calico
    Link
    Last year, I took a trip to visit my husband family and they drank every night with a meal. So when we got back to the states, we developed the habit of drinking often. Both of our family has a...

    Last year, I took a trip to visit my husband family and they drank every night with a meal. So when we got back to the states, we developed the habit of drinking often. Both of our family has a terrible history with alcoholism.

    After the holidays, we ended up going cold turkey for about two months with one exception (a celebratory milestone). Purposely going cold turkey make us more aware what other choices are there outside of drinking. We are fortunate to live where we have some mocktails or NA beers. We gained a decent amount of clarity and our ability to say no. Honestly it was freeing.
    We did eventually brought back some alcohol back, but it's more manegable. We have a few rules.

    1. We drink Friday or Saturday depending on our schedule.
    2. No hard liquor for the house. We can buy one bottle of wine or 4 pk of beer at a time for our dinner.
    3. We are allow to drink in socially.

    Hope this helps.

  2. Comment on Manhattan co-op in crisis spearheads push to cap land rent hikes in ~finance

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    I agree mostly, but I want to preface I dont have too much expertise in this subject matter, just local knowledge. Originally when I read the question, I thought it pertains to coops in general....

    I agree mostly, but I want to preface I dont have too much expertise in this subject matter, just local knowledge. Originally when I read the question, I thought it pertains to coops in general.

    The better way is to allow the coop to have some sort of finance agreement to buyout the land. Although this is much more complicated then it seems. Like Coop City is leased by the state government so buying out state land is either impossible or next to impossible. That some residents want the land to be leased by the state rather than themselves. Individual situation depends on who owns the lands, how much the coop can feasible finance, cooperation from coop board.

    1 vote

  3. Comment on Manhattan co-op in crisis spearheads push to cap land rent hikes in ~finance

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    What specific type of agreements should be phrased out? Never thought about this either, even though I almost bought a Coop in Queens before the pandemic. It would be hard to pull the carpet under...

    What specific type of agreements should be phrased out?

    Never thought about this either, even though I almost bought a Coop in Queens before the pandemic. It would be hard to pull the carpet under the table situation that would take more than a real estate lawyer. Even if they did, it will all be a lengthly court process.
    There isn't any new Coop being built in NYC. It's mostly condos, which has its ups and downs.

    Coop is more of a response for residents and developers to take ownership over their buildings such who lives there and maintenance. I used to lived in a coop where the residents ousted their slumlord in the 70s and formed a Coop. The residents in that specific building are pretty dilligent in building repairs and picky who gets to live there. Unless a group people have resource and energy to form a corporation, they are not really being formed. Coop model as I understand it was a way for people to own the existing building with a few exception such as Coop City.

    2 votes

  4. Comment on ‘Mitzvah night is cancelled’ Inside the sex strike that has infuriated husbands and shaken the ultra-Orthodox world in ~life.women

  5. Comment on ‘Mitzvah night is cancelled’ Inside the sex strike that has infuriated husbands and shaken the ultra-Orthodox world in ~life.women

    Captain_calico
    (edited )
    Link
    This was shared in my local discord, and I thought it was interesting to see as an outsider of the women's struggles in these communities. And how women navigate through their own communities to...

    This was shared in my local discord, and I thought it was interesting to see as an outsider of the women's struggles in these communities. And how women navigate through their own communities to try to get the laws applied justify to them.

    Edit: Now I have more time to comment. Few things I want to point out the part about modesty, is the town of kiryas Joel has a sign to cover your elbow and knees. Which isnt enforceable if you are not part of the community, but the place is so odd you want to drive through the area anyway. The sign and neighborhood always weirded me out when I drive pass that area.

    What interests me about this article since their flavor of conservatism is rooted in tradition governed by fairly strict logic, the women found a way to protest. By not undergoing their cleansing practice, and therefore sex is considered a sin in that regard. Because religious and comminity rigidity, they were able to find ways to make their point across by not participating in them. So, good for them for finding ways to fight back on their patriarchal and corrupt structure so they can gain some equality in their own communities.

    17 votes

  7. Comment on Some observations about some of the conversations here in ~tildes

    Captain_calico
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    What I did during COVID lock down, was watching the PBS Newshour and Cuomo's daily briefly (lived in NY) instead of gluing myself to the news. Kept my sanity in check. I really should go back to...

    What I did during COVID lock down, was watching the PBS Newshour and Cuomo's daily briefly (lived in NY) instead of gluing myself to the news. Kept my sanity in check.

    I really should go back to watching PBS news hour. It really helps to understand the state of the country in a plain, but informative manner. Without the time sink.

    2 votes

  8. Comment on Some observations about some of the conversations here in ~tildes

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Depends on the size of the communities imo. I prefer no downvote system in smaller communities such as here since the responses are fairly manageable. Smaller communities need to encourage more...

    Depends on the size of the communities imo. I prefer no downvote system in smaller communities such as here since the responses are fairly manageable. Smaller communities need to encourage more engagement and to decrease the barrier to participate. Moderation also is different in smaller groups since it is more intimate. In my opinion, it's easier for people to call out specific detail or educate a certain topic.

    Larger communities like reddit where brigading, spamming, and all sort of nastiness is more common, downvoting is more justifiable. Downvoting helps moderator to weed out bad faith actor, spam, and etc. But the downside, people tend to get more defensive about their argument and meaner. A bad moderator can make the community toxic and uninviting. There is a reason why I associate Reddit with toxicity.

    I would say, I dislike upvote and downvote system in general because of their simplicity. And, it would be nice to see a forum or discussion based social media that has a range of stamps that is not facebook, and maybe not emoticon based.

    1 vote

  9. Comment on Carbon dioxide pipelines and underground injection can cut greenhouse gas, but community opposition is fierce in ~enviro

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    The problem lies whether if methodology can safely sequester carbon dioxide and if we can trust these companies in the first place. Personally, I don't have too much trust in these companies. They...

    The problem lies whether if methodology can safely sequester carbon dioxide and if we can trust these companies in the first place. Personally, I don't have too much trust in these companies. They have plenty of smart engineers and geologist working for them. But we have seen time and again that they have lied and mismanaged many projects and the science.

    I'm not too fond in simply siding with ExxonMobil to geoengineering our way out of this. But not because of the technology itself but rather a poor implementation of said technology can cause more harm then good.

    That said. I would need to look into this more closely to make an informed opinion.

    6 votes

  10. Comment on Kendrick Lamar - Meet the Grahams (2024) in ~music

    Captain_calico
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    Never thought I'll ever hear saxophone jazz diss track in my life. https://youtu.be/lE2VhEnmCiQ?si=3pF_vo0OnCqnkpgg Edit: Well, metro boomin is getting outed as a metro groomer. :(

    Never thought I'll ever hear saxophone jazz diss track in my life.

    https://youtu.be/lE2VhEnmCiQ?si=3pF_vo0OnCqnkpgg

    Edit: Well, metro boomin is getting outed as a metro groomer. :(

    5 votes

  11. Comment on Kendrick Lamar - Meet the Grahams (2024) in ~music

  12. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

  13. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Thanks for the food recommendation. I will probably check some of these places out. Yeah, I grew up around NYC, so I have some city sense. I am planning to get a retractable leash for our wallets...

    Thanks for the food recommendation. I will probably check some of these places out.

    Yeah, I grew up around NYC, so I have some city sense. I am planning to get a retractable leash for our wallets or wear my trusty hidden belt wallet that I bought for Lima.

    1 vote

  14. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    I'm sorry to hear that. I'm planning to dress like I'm going to NYC, so hopefully I don't stick out too much.

    I'm sorry to hear that. I'm planning to dress like I'm going to NYC, so hopefully I don't stick out too much.

    1 vote

  15. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Omg their glassware is amazing!!! Im definitely penciling this down.

    Omg their glassware is amazing!!! Im definitely penciling this down.

  16. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Thanks for the writeup. We're looking into architectural tours around the city. I'm a big urban planning need, so this is up my alley.

    Thanks for the writeup. We're looking into architectural tours around the city. I'm a big urban planning need, so this is up my alley.

  17. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Thanks for the writeup! This is amazing. My husband and I are debating whether to go Picasso or Dali museum. I'm leaning towards Dali since I have seen Picasco exhibition at the MOMA. One of the...

    Thanks for the writeup! This is amazing. My husband and I are debating whether to go Picasso or Dali museum. I'm leaning towards Dali since I have seen Picasco exhibition at the MOMA.

    One of the big reason why my husband and I choose spain was to practice our Spanish. So hopefully I can get my spanish up to conversational level.

    I'm asian, so I'm going to stick out like sore thumb either way. I'm gonna take the advice of leaning on being a tourist by heart. Once again thanks for the write up.

    3 votes

  18. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Only for two night, so a very short stay. We're not going to drive for this trip. I am not too keen in driving in other countries unless I'm more familiar with their roads and drivers. I would...

    Only for two night, so a very short stay. We're not going to drive for this trip. I am not too keen in driving in other countries unless I'm more familiar with their roads and drivers.

    I would appreciate the document, but I don't want to cause any inconvenience.

    1 vote

  19. Comment on Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July? in ~travel

    Captain_calico
    Link Parent
    Make sense, I would be annoyed if some one start speaking Dutch to me.

    Make sense, I would be annoyed if some one start speaking Dutch to me.

    3 votes

  20. Any tips for Barcelona and Lisbon in June/July?

    ~travel Ask (recommendations)
    Hey Tildes, My husband and I are planning a trip to Barcelona and Lisbon at end of June. I'm looking for any tips and things to know about Spain/Portugal. Any thing I should get in advance like...

    Hey Tildes,

    My husband and I are planning a trip to Barcelona and Lisbon at end of June.

    I'm looking for any tips and things to know about Spain/Portugal.

    Any thing I should get in advance like museum tickets or tours. Looking for a night life scene that isn't so much of a tourist trap. Also, any ettiquete I should know about. This would my second time in Europe, so any advice would be appreciated.

    20 votes