WeAreWaves's recent activity

  1. Comment on US Supreme Court ruling greenlights nearly all racial gerrymandering in ~misc

    WeAreWaves
    Link
    Yikes. We all knew it was coming but seriously holy shit. Officially from the US Supreme Court, it is legitimate, worthy, and legal to disenfranchise minorities as long as it furthers your...

    Yikes. We all knew it was coming but seriously holy shit.

    Officially from the US Supreme Court, it is legitimate, worthy, and legal to disenfranchise minorities as long as it furthers your partisan aims.

    44 votes

  2. Comment on Indiana judge rules tacos, burritos are sandwiches in ~food

  3. Comment on Indiana judge rules tacos, burritos are sandwiches in ~food

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I’m not sure this is ever the case no matter what is promised beforehand.

    you're going to be disappointed if they bring a bag of Taco John's.

    I’m not sure this is ever the case no matter what is promised beforehand.

    13 votes

  4. Comment on What is a value or belief you have that is extremely outside the norm? in ~talk

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    Never formally diagnosed as such, but maybe. I don’t think that negates my point though, as there is no way to know whether a new human will struggle with depression or not. Having a child is a...

    Never formally diagnosed as such, but maybe. I don’t think that negates my point though, as there is no way to know whether a new human will struggle with depression or not. Having a child is a roll of the dice with a non-negligible probability of “I wish I hadn’t been born”.

    2 votes

  5. Comment on What is a value or belief you have that is extremely outside the norm? in ~talk

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    This is exactly my point that having kids is fundamentally selfish. The most important person affected by the choice to have a child is the new human being, not the parent. The child cannot...

    so why not just do what will make me happy?

    This is exactly my point that having kids is fundamentally selfish. The most important person affected by the choice to have a child is the new human being, not the parent. The child cannot consent to that.

    If the choice is given any real thought, the reasoning is parent-centric (I want a kid, this will make me happy; the world would be better with more of me in it) and this is misaligned with the real impacts of the choice.

    Sharing your values with future generations also does not necessitate creating new human beings.

    4 votes

  6. Comment on What is a value or belief you have that is extremely outside the norm? in ~talk

    WeAreWaves
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    I sympathize with the view. I let myself be talked into having a kid after being on the fence / somewhat against it. My kid is doing great, but I still struggle with the choice. Creating a person...

    I sympathize with the view. I let myself be talked into having a kid after being on the fence / somewhat against it.

    My kid is doing great, but I still struggle with the choice.

    Creating a person from nonexistence and forcing them to go through a whole life with no guarantees about how that life will be no matter how hard you try or what your situation is… it’s a lot. In all likelihood we’ll die before she does (hopefully), so we will never know if she will be happy to have lived when she looks back on her life. There very well may be periods where she’ll wish she just hadn’t been born, and that’s something we forced on her with no possibility of consent. And there’s no easy way out of this world once you’re in it.

    To me, having kids is a fundamentally selfish choice.

    I don’t know maybe I’m still sort of an anti natalist…

    11 votes

  7. Comment on What is a value or belief you have that is extremely outside the norm? in ~talk

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    How far does this extend? Do you feel similarly about aristocracy in general? What about de facto aristocracies where you can be born into obscene wealth and twist the political system to your...

    How far does this extend? Do you feel similarly about aristocracy in general? What about de facto aristocracies where you can be born into obscene wealth and twist the political system to your will even if you don’t officially have a birth-right title?

    Not trying to argue - just genuinely curious since I can feel the vehemence dripping from your post.

    11 votes

  8. Comment on AT&T announces $7 monthly add-on fee for “Turbo” 5G speeds in ~tech

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I pay £5 for half a gig each month and that’s plenty. I’m basically always on WiFi and just pre-download music or podcasts before getting in the car.

    I pay £5 for half a gig each month and that’s plenty. I’m basically always on WiFi and just pre-download music or podcasts before getting in the car.

    2 votes

  9. Comment on How are you dealing with inflation regarding everyday enjoyment? in ~life

    WeAreWaves
    Link
    I’ve picked back up on budgeting after a few years of hiatus during a string of major life changes that made my old system of spreadsheets and manual entries less feasible. I started using YNAB...

    I’ve picked back up on budgeting after a few years of hiatus during a string of major life changes that made my old system of spreadsheets and manual entries less feasible.

    I started using YNAB and it’s become a bit of a hobby actually.

    It’s not necessarily due to inflation, but having a better handle on where our money is going (and being more proactive in deciding what our spending priorities really are) really helps when money feels tight.

    2 votes

  10. Comment on The cycling revolution in Paris continues: Bicycle use now exceeds car use in ~transport

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I look at it as the inverse - driving is best for specific use cases while cycling is more convenient for everyday default trips. Cars are better (or even necessary) for getting to hiking trails...

    I look at it as the inverse - driving is best for specific use cases while cycling is more convenient for everyday default trips.

    Cars are better (or even necessary) for getting to hiking trails on the weekends or the occasions when I do need to move a lot of stuff. I live in a place that’s cold, wet, and windy pretty often regardless of the season, so I do commute by car when wind gusts get above about 40 mph.

    Other than that, bikes work for me, my wife, and our 3 year old. We commute by bike, take her to and from preschool by bike, pick up groceries by bike, go into town or nearby hikes/beaches by bike, get to friends’ houses by bike…

    Our normal daily life doesn’t require a car, but have one we use for the occasions when it’s needed. I realize everyone’s situation is different and it sounds like you need to lug a bunch of stuff with you more often. I’m just pointing out that for many people, thats not the case and traveling by bike would be completely feasible.

    So basically, we should use the right tool for the right job.

    Also, I think it’s a much more pleasant and invigorating way to get around even in shitty weather. As long as you dress properly.

    6 votes

  11. Comment on I grew up in Michigan but currently live in Georgia. My GF and I are looking at buying a house, and both states have first time home buyer incentives, but they're income based. in ~finance

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    What if she lived there for free but paid for other normal budget items?

    What if she lived there for free but paid for other normal budget items?

    1 vote

  12. Comment on Fellow hardline materialists, how do you "enchant" the world? in ~talk

    WeAreWaves
    Link
    I pretend. Those rock outcroppings that very vaguely could be humanoid in shape? Mountain trolls. Mossy boulder in the forest? Entrance to the faerie realm. I also have a habit of building small...

    I pretend. Those rock outcroppings that very vaguely could be humanoid in shape? Mountain trolls. Mossy boulder in the forest? Entrance to the faerie realm. I also have a habit of building small stick dwellings or entrances to little hidey holes when I’m out on hikes. It’s a fun bit of make believe that might also make the world a little more interesting for other people.

    Maybe not quite what you’re looking for, but I also read a lot of fantasy.

    8 votes

  13. Comment on US Federal Trade Commission and eight states sue to block supermarket merger between Kroger and Albertsons in ~finance

  14. Comment on Ski vacations in the Alps are becoming increasingly elitist in ~travel

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I just finished a half day skiing at Glencoe - not fantastic snow in Scotland, but still fun. A day pass is £30 for an adult (£37 during school holidays), so a day skiing costs us about the same...

    I just finished a half day skiing at Glencoe - not fantastic snow in Scotland, but still fun. A day pass is £30 for an adult (£37 during school holidays), so a day skiing costs us about the same as two meals of fish and chips.

    3 votes

  15. Comment on Cousins are disappearing worldwide, according to new study in ~life

    WeAreWaves
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    This could also be a sampling bias. As you say, 2nd children get less attention from their parents. For the exact same struggles, a 2nd child might just be less likely to be brought to therapy...

    my psychiatrist says he's noticed that he sees a lot fewer second children than first children

    This could also be a sampling bias. As you say, 2nd children get less attention from their parents. For the exact same struggles, a 2nd child might just be less likely to be brought to therapy than an only child - whether that’s from decreased awareness by the parents, less time available so the threshold changes, or a change in parental perspective about what’s serious enough to seek help.

    Or, 2nd+ children might have just been brought up feeling more of a “deal with your own problems” attitude since the 1:1 or 2:1 parent:child attention wasn’t there, and so they’re less likely to seek therapy as adults.

    Just pointing out that, even if your therapist is right about broad trends based on their anecdotal experience, there are many more possible explanations than “later children are better adjusted”.

    9 votes

  16. Comment on New US bank-overdraft fee limits to go into effect in ~finance

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I’m an American living in Scotland and my bank here is such a breath of fresh air. They treat their customers like adults. If you overdraft, you get a notification saying that they’ll charge the...

    I’m an American living in Scotland and my bank here is such a breath of fresh air. They treat their customers like adults.

    If you overdraft, you get a notification saying that they’ll charge the stated percent interest on it unless you get the needed funds in by the end of the day. No immediate fees, just a perfectly reasonable “fix this by the close of business please”.

    My point is that there are other reasonable options between an immediate $35 fee and a rejected transaction.

    13 votes

  17. Comment on Electric cars are not the future – In cities at least, e-bikes make more cultural and consumer sense in ~transport

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    It would be great to get to a place where cars are considered the supplement instead, with other modes considered the default. I live in a cold, wet, windy place and have a kid. We have an...

    It would be great to get to a place where cars are considered the supplement instead, with other modes considered the default.

    I live in a cold, wet, windy place and have a kid. We have an electric cargo bike and a non electric commuter with a seat on the back for her. The car is only necessary for safety (being risk averse) maybe 10% of the time throughout the year.

    5 votes

  18. Comment on What's on your Christmas lists, dads of Tildes? in ~life.men

    WeAreWaves
    Link Parent
    I have one I use when I’m biking or doing anything where injuring a finger is more likely. It’s much easier to cut through a silicone band than get a metal ring off a severely swollen finger.

    I have one I use when I’m biking or doing anything where injuring a finger is more likely. It’s much easier to cut through a silicone band than get a metal ring off a severely swollen finger.

    5 votes

  19. Comment on What is a classical music piece you like? And why? in ~music

  20. Comment on The Xmas music playlist at my job is awful; give me your best non-traditional holiday songs! in ~music

    WeAreWaves
    (edited )
    Link
    Sufjan Stevens has a couple Christmas albums like Songs for Christmas and Silver and Gold. There’s also the Bright Eyes A Christmas Album that has a few beautiful renditions of traditional songs,...

    Sufjan Stevens has a couple Christmas albums like Songs for Christmas and Silver and Gold.

    There’s also the Bright Eyes A Christmas Album that has a few beautiful renditions of traditional songs, including Maria Taylor singing White Christmas and the saddest version of Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas I’ve ever heard.

    For something totally different, we always enjoy playing Christmas music from Austria / Germany - there are a bunch of playlists on Spotify if you search weinachtsmusik and/or alpenländisch. A lot of it is instrumental and it isn’t the typical US Christmas songs, so it’s easier to listen to for longer periods. Definitely still has a winter holiday feel.

    Oooor you could throw in a classic from my childhood: The Night Santa Went Crazy by Weird Al.

    9 votes